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Let’s be real:
You often feel stretched to the limits between carting children here and there, housework, your own personal pursuits, making sure dinner is ready, all of it.
You get help, of course, yours is a modern family, after all.
You’ve taught your children to clear the table and run the dishwasher, your husband is no slouch either, he does his part.
You meal plan, you have the pretty pink planner and it’s filled out with color-coded stickers and pen marks, you write out your daily to-do list.
But, you still feel flustered. There are still moments of pure chaos, you hit the drive-thru for a quick dinner a little more often than you’d like, you keep running out of time to do all the things.
It all looks good on paper, you’re doing all the right things but still – there’s a disconnect somewhere.
These 5 Rules of Time Management will help you start to create that sense of calm in your life so you can weed out the trivial and get focused on your true goals.
1. It’s OK to say NO
How much time are you spending doing things that don’t align with what’s in your heart?
I know we know this, we hear it everywhere. We tell our friends this all the time. But, do we truly believe it? Does it apply to our own lives?
Maxine Walters said it best, “Reclaiming my Time” and it should apply to all of us. I know it’s hard and I know it goes against everything you’ve been told to do, everything you’ve been taught to do.
Women are ingrained from birth to be people-pleasers and this behavior sometimes causes us to really forget about the important things.
Commit to saying yes when it benefits your family or yourself; once your home base is taken care of, only then it’s ok to say yes to other commitments.
Helping others is a slippery slope and one you need to continually evaluate and re-adjust as you go. It’s not about not doing good things for other people at all, it’s about choosing ways in which to give that are respectful of our own time and our family. Reclaim your time and reclaim your life.
2. Be a Morning Person
As cliche as it is, the early bird really does catch the worm.
It’s hard, I know it’s hard AF, but when you wake up before the family you’re able to be more proactive, anticipate problems and handle them with grace and ease and organize or anticipate what could come your way.
You may even want to sneak in a workout during this time. (crazy talk, I know… but it works too) This will set a positive tone for the day and help you think clearly, focus and be present in every moment throughout the day. The benefits of daily exercise create a cyclical effect and the increased energy from working out will help you sleep better and be well-rested so you’re better able to easily wake up early.
Now, I’m not going to lie to you, getting up early is a struggle for me but I’ve been doing fairly well after incorporating into my day, the approaches taught in The Miracle Morning for Parents and Families How to bring out the best in your KIDS and your SELF.
I’m also going to be real with you and say that it’s easier if you actually buy the audiobook and listen to it while driving or doing dishes, because….well, time management.
The Miracle Morning for Parents and Families is designed to help you master your own self-leadership and personal growth while learning to become an exceptional parent, the kind your children deserve and become who you were always meant to be!
You can see the full list of The Miracle Morning series of books by Hal Elrod here, there’s seriously something for everyone; Network Marketers, Salespeople, Real Estate Agents, Entrepreneurs, College Students, Writers, Action-Plan Books, Journals, even a coloring book of affirmations! So fun!
Sounds awesome right? This is such important work to me and what I touch on in my own 12 week Lifestyle Coaching Program, being present and productive while maintaining a healthy lifestyle; Body, Mind and Soul.
3. Quit the 9-5
Are you doing the wrong things at the wrong time of day?
For the longest time I was trying to fit in everything during the day while my husband was at work; I had some outdated mindset that dinner had to be ready and the house needed to be in order by 6 p.m. At some point however, reality took over, thankfully!
My husband doesn’t care if dinner isn’t ready until 7:30 or there are LEGO all over the floor. (When are there never LEGO on the floor, let’s be real) He gets it and he appreciates that the days are hectic and busy, sometimes it’s easier to do all the things at night.
I am a homeschooling mom, a writer, vlogger, blogger and social media influencer. Because my husband is self-employed, I help him with various projects throughout the year, my priorities are around homeschooling and work. What I don’t delegate, I take care of myself but I don’t try to get it all done during “business hours”
I learned that by simply doing the ‘house’ stuff later in the day, I was better able to focus on my goals for myself and my businesses and my sons academics.
While dinner is cooking, I use the time between 5 p.m. and 9 p.m. to bring the house back to order, plan for the next few days, fold laundry while watching a favorite show, etc…
I’m much more productive and less stressed after having made the shift from 9-5 to 5-9.
4. The Mindset Shift
Do you come from a mindset of ‘having enough time’?
Sometimes it’s as simple as changing our inner voice and creating affirmations around time-management that resonate with our goals and tasks before us.
Make an effort to change the direction of your inner speak to positive, present-tense affirmations to put yourself in the mindset of having enough time for all of the things that you deem a priority.
Rather than say “There’s no way, I’ll get everything done” or
“I don’t have time for this”
Start each day with an affirmation like the one in the image below. They work once you start to use them consistently throughout the day and weave them into your regular inner-voice.
5. Treat Yourself Like a Stranger
We extend grace to everyone else, friends, family, children, strangers. Why don’t we do the same for ourselves?
We often tend to treat strangers better than our own family. When a friend cancels plans (if you’re not an introvert like I am, and breathe a sigh of relief) you’ll say “Oh, hey, no problem, I understand.” or “Oh, I’ve been, there…I get it”
And you do, you do understand, you have been there.
So why, when we fail to cross everything off of our to-do list, we get down on ourselves and start the negative inner talk?
Treat yourself as you’d treat a friend or even a stranger. “Oh, hey… it’s ok, I have a lot going on, no worries. It will get done, I understand.”
I’ve been telling my current Lifestyle Coaching group that in order to change our negative thinking and modify our inner voice we need to cut ourselves some slack; extend grace to ourselves, too.
I will hold myself to a standard of GRACE not perfection.
So while we live crazy-busy lives, we also have to recognize that they don’t necessarily have to be that way. We’ve become moms who feel as they they must do-it-all and that often comes at the expense of ourselves.
It’s a concept that I had to learn the hard way. Shoot, my YouTube channel is called Crazy Busy Family Life, after all. But what I’ve realized over the years as I approach 43, is that it doesn’t have to be crazy-busy.
I don’t have to appear to have it all together, I don’t even have to pretend to have it all together. People like me better when I’m open about my struggles and up-front about my flaws.
Prioritizing what is important in life is key, following a clear set of rules like the ones outlined above can help put life into perspective so that we learn to extend grace to ourselves as we would any other person.